(Big) Baby's First Massage
When getting a massage, remember that it's a team effort
Story by Amanda M. Smith
Photos provided by Amanda M. Smith and Massage Envy
Massage Envy is a national spa chain specializing in various massage techniques and facials. (Photo Provided)
I’ve always wanted a massage but could never afford it. One day, I saw a commercial for Massage Envy in Williston, Vt. I had never heard of it, but I looked it up and saw the corporation is nationwide. There are even a bunch of them near my hometown on Long Island, so I decided to give it a try.
As an inexperienced customer, I was skeptical due to the fact that I would be receiving a massage from a chain company, but I tried to think more positively. The commercials and website looked very put-together and clean, and I assumed the massage parlor would be, too.
This particular parlor sparked my interest purely because I could actually afford it! Their special introductory rate of $39 per hour was inexpensive enough for my boyfriend, Michael, and I to get a couple’s massage. Any other time, the rate would be double that, so I took advantage of the offer. A massage for two was going to cost under $80—I had to do it.
Because I had never received a full body massage before, I researched the massage chain as much as possible. On their site, I found a great page that tells you everything you need to know about getting a massage for the first time: what to expect, etiquette, and helpful tips. I considered upgrading my massage with aromatherapy for $10 extra or deep muscle therapy for $12. When I saw that my one-hour session included my choice of Swedish or deep tissue, I opted not to upgrade, but to get a deep tissue massage. I figured I was a good candidate for deep tissue because I suffer from anxiety, which can tense up muscles. Apparently, a firsttime massage-goer shouldn't opt for a deep tissue massage, but I'll get into that a little later.
Upon walking in, the place was clean and organized, and I found out they took appointments until 7 p.m. Like the website suggested, I got there early to fill out the forms and wrote down that I have reoccurring lower back problems.
“Upon walking in, the place was clean and organized, and I found out they took appointments until
7 p.m."
After waiting in a calming waiting room with soothing music and a warming neck pillow, the desk assistant went over our paperwork, asking us questions and verifying information. She specifically asked if this was going to be our first time being massaged, and we said yes.
The desk assistant told us to wait for our masseuses, who would take us to our room. A woman came to our meditation waiting room and told us she was one of our masseuses. My masseuse tried putting on a smile, but I could see past it—it was 8 p.m. and she wanted to go home. Instead of thinking about her, I tried clearing my mind and began to pay attention to the soothing ambiance. The music faded into the background to make for relaxing white noise while I drifted in and out of consciousness.
Halfway through the massage, when my masseuse asked me to turn over, it was hard for me to do so because my lower back hurt so much. I couldn’t even tell it hurt until I got up. There was no pressure or pain in the area that hurt, but I continued on. Some of her rough strokes were uncomfortable, but I figured, “no pain, no gain.”
After she and the other girl left the room, I tried sliding off the table because my back hurt so badly. Michael began to laugh as I stood bent over the table and mostly naked.
Guests are encouraged to meditate in the waiting room so they can clear their minds and enjoy the massage more.
“Are you serious?” he asked.
“Yes! I’m about to cry! It hurts so much!" I responded.
Mind you, I have a fairly high pain tolerance and rarely cry. I even needed him to help me put my clothes on since I couldn’t stand up straight or bend down.
“Well, I enjoyed it,” Michael said.
“Well, good for you…” I snapped back.
"Remember to breathe," he said.
With clothing now on, I awkwardly hopped over to the door and met one of our masseuses holding a tray with two small cups of water. Seeing the pain on my face, she asked how I was. “Horrible,” I said. “I can barely walk.”
“I should have made my feelings clear to the masseuse."
She told me that since it was my first time here, I probably wasn’t used to the intense deep tissue massage, and the fact that I have had recent back pain didn’t help. She even sat me down and explained what physically happened to my body. It seemed to make sense at the time, but after talking to friends about it, I realized that if this was a common occurance, they should have advised me not to get a deep tissue massage, knowing this was my first time.
Michael enjoying the tranquil waiting room. Warming neck towels were complimentary for every guest.
Though my personal experience makes Massage Envy look substandard, the only thing I can count as a fault of theirs is letting their desk assistant go through my paperwork and not relaying that information to the massage therapist. At first, I didn’t realize how something like this could have happened because Massage Envy requires their massage therapists to be certified in the field. Then I remembered: it wasn’t the massage therapist who looked at my paperwork—it was the desk assistant. To ensure this doesn’t happen again, their front desk personnel should be nearly as knowledgeable as the therapists themselves.
If anything, it was my mistake for not informing them to be less rough on me when my massage hurt. I stayed quiet thinking along the lines of “no pain, no gain” and figured my muscles would feel relaxed afterward. Just as Massage Envy’s “first timers” web page recommended, I should have made my feelings clear to the masseuse.
APN gives Massage Envy a 3.5 out of 5.
